History jokes
On the day of 9/11, the WTC's ordered cheese and pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
Brits don't exist. Mummies can't have kids.
The History of the Star Spangled Banner. By Jose Cannusee.
My grandpa was in 9/11. He was the best pilot.
John Wilkes Booth, to his fiancee: "I have an important role to play tonight at Ford's Theater."
Fiancee: "Break a leg!"
Memes
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
Why can't the T-Rex clap?
Because they're extinct!
Why can't the T-Rex cross the road?
Because he's extinct.
*World War 2 going on and then stops.*
Me: "I guess you would say it was a gory-ious battle."
Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?
Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.
Wy can't a dinosaw ror? Becase it losed it's voucal kord.
History teacher: "They had a temporary cure for the disease, but it would be years before they found a cure for life."
Student: "I need that."
What do you call a Mongolian swindler?
A Khan artist.
I was going to make a 9/11 joke, but I'm afraid it will crash and burn.
Two planes crashed into two separate towers.
Now two towers crash into two separate planes.
Q: Did you hear about the Twin Towers?
A: No, what happened?
Q: Apparently, the design was fundamentally floored!
Need an arch? I Noah guy.
My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.
Why can’t Germans call a taxi? *does taxi calling motion*
Wonder why the Japanese people didn't see the bombs coming?
They didn't open their eyes.