History jokes

Why do white people own so many pets?

'Cause they can't own people anymore.

Why is the Leaning Tower of Pisa leaning?

Because unlike the Twin Towers, it can dodge!

Basically, the Twin Towers are Angry Birds but in real life.

Why was 10 scared? Because 9/11.

What did the North Tower say to the South Tower?

"Let's talk later, I need to catch a plane."

Hey, America. No towers? :(

The reason why in the US their emergency number is 911 is because of my uncle Mohamed, RIP, best pilot ever.

Why is the Leaning Tower of Pisa leaning?

It has better reactions than the Twin Towers.

Did you know the Titanic sank in water?

Titanic 1, Africa 0.

Are you the Twin Towers? Because I'd smash.

Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.

Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.

Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?

Your hairline goes so far back, I remember seeing it in the Stone Age.

What did one slave owner say to the other slave owner when he couldn’t find his slave?

Don’t worry, I’ll rope him in.

My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.

I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.

Q: Why did Hitler shoot himself?

A: Because his mother taught him to take out the trash.

My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was a blow job.

My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.

I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would probably go up in flames.

WJE officially a gone memory.

What's an emo's favorite way of growing food?

The slash and burn tactic.