History jokes

9/11 called for help. What did that get? Nothing.

The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they were pissed as all they got was plane.

Yo Mama is so FAT, it wasn't an iceberg that sank it, she was called, "THE MAMABERG!"

TommyInnit said, "Long live the Queen." Look at where she's at now.

What should you use to battle a T-Rex?

A dino-sword.

What's so bad about 9 divided by 11?

I wonder if the 2 Irish kids off the Titanic movie who went to sleep before it sank had wet dreams?

"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."

What do you call a blind German?

A Nazi (not see).

What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?

Usain finished the races.

Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?

Why do people hit their electronics when they don’t work?

You keep the tradition of hitting black things.

I loved the Twin Towers, it's a shame my dad didn't.

Due to her death, you can no longer get a letter from the Queen when you turn 100.

Instead, you now receive a text from Prince Andrew when you turn 14.

Your hairline go so far back it remember the Civil War, ugly ahh.

Why do black people have nightmares? Because the last person who had a dream got shot.

I was walking with my black best friend, and he was meeting my parents, and after I got there, they said, "Who's this?" I said, "Well, I own him."

Ted Bundy walks into a bar wearing all black. The bartender asks, “Whose funeral is it?”

Ted Bundy looks around the room and replies, “I haven’t decided yet.”

What did the Twin Towers say when they saw the airplane?

Batter up!

Where did Sora go during Nagasaki?

Everywhere.