History jokes

Did you know the Bible has a passage about killing babies by smashing them against rocks?

That's probably because microwaves hadn't been invented yet.

Yo Mama is so FAT, it wasn't an iceberg that sank it, she was called, "THE MAMABERG!"

TommyInnit said, "Long live the Queen." Look at where she's at now.

9/11 called for help. What did that get? Nothing.

The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they were pissed as all they got was plane.

What should you use to battle a T-Rex?

A dino-sword.

What's so bad about 9 divided by 11?

I wonder if the 2 Irish kids off the Titanic movie who went to sleep before it sank had wet dreams?

"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."

"Welcome to the gulag."

Someone forgot to do half the questions in the history test.

And that's what made him go down in history.

"September 11th plane driving classes for free."

The Twin Towers were like a woman stuck in the washer machine. They both got freed.

Hope the towers are doing well this morning, and I'll get back to you!

What's Mussolini's favorite food?

Fussolini!

My dad died in 9/11... He was the best pilot I know.

KK or Liv?

The West is dying...just like the romance of an empire, especially the western part of the empire. Funny that, 'cause the East was going strong.

What was the last thing that went through PH's head?

Water and smoke.

My grandpa was the best soldier ever. He gunned down over 100 soldiers in his bunker during D-Day.