Her jokes

Sally had 69 boobs, which was 222 many, 69,222. So she went to the doctor on 51st street, 69,222,51, who gave her pills. She took them 8 times a day, and now she is boobless.

Yo mama is so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall.

My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.

My Mum texted me she had lost her phone.

What did the mom say when her child came out?

"The head was so big!"

My sister thinks she's sooooo smart. She said that the only food that makes you cry is onions, therefore I threw a coconut at her.

I went up the temp girl and slapped her tests and said-

"I like ya cut, G."

Yo mama so ugly that Mr. Rogers doesn’t wanna be her neighbor.

Yo mama so fat that if we cut her open, we could stop world hunger.

My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden.

He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, "You have to dig a little."

I asked what was her favorite type of magic. She said, "the one you make."

And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.

One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."

My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my other girlfriend.

Yo mama so fat that her belt size is the Equator.

I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes.

A few hours later, dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said, "Honey, can you get the mashed potatoes?" Dad said, "Why, she’s right here."

An Ob-Gyn asks a lady to put her feet up on the stirrups.

Doctor: My God, you have the biggest vagina I’ve ever seen!

Woman: You don’t have to say that twice.

Doctor: I didn’t.

I saw a homeless dude and gave him $1.

I saw a homeless woman and gave her $0.77.

Dating 101:

Here's what you do:

1. Dinner. 2. Kiss. 3. Movie. 4. Sex. 5. Bring her back home. 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting.

What is the most awkward moment when Helen Keller is playing pin the tail on the donkey?

Her friends aren’t sure whether to blindfold her.