Her jokes

My ex-wife misses me, but her aim is getting better.

I saw a girl crying. I asked her, "Where are your parents?" She cried as I got kicked out of the orphanage.

DARK ALERT********

A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.

DARK ALERT********

I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesn’t beat her old primary school one. 😀

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.

Jack got high and grabbed Jill's thigh and said, "I know you wanna!"

Jill said yes, lifted up her dress, and then they had some fun,

But stupid Jill forgot the pill and now they have a son.

Yo mama so old.

Her first Christmas... was the first Christmas!

A married woman asked her husband if he saw the future. The husband answered her, "I have no eye, dear."

Hellen Keller went to go grab her bouncy balls.

Man: Ouch!

How do you kill Hellen Keller?

Take her on a walk off a cliff.

I love when I could run through the grass and feel the wind on my face.

Then my mom told me to get off VR, and then I wheeled myself to her.

I got fired my first day at the bank. This old lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.

"What?" Angelica replied.

"I'm a guy."

My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.

What’s the difference between KFC and a woman on her period?

One is finger-licking good, and the other is just a fast-food restaurant.

Your mama is so stupid that she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.

Yo mama is so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall.

What hits the ground first, an apple or an emo girl?

The rope would catch her.

My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden.

He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, "You have to dig a little."

Step on your small sister's foot, she will always open her mouth like a dustbin.

Yo mama so fat that if we cut her open, we could stop world hunger.