Health jokes

Doctor, can I please have a new butt? My old one has a hole and a crack in it.

Carys’s mum has chemo.

Yo, Dad is so skinny, he doesn't work out enough.

Lucky they're only balls, not real balls!

Yo mama so fat, when she ate one cheeseburger, she pooped it out immediately because her butt was too big.

Yo mama so fat, she died!

What did the butt say to the other butt? "I got big fat apples for butt checks!"

One day in my class, we were having that good snack, and one of my classmates choked on a Cheerio. One small, single, Cheerio!

There are 6 kinds of vitamins. Wanna know how the 6th vitamin was made? Just ask the Ku Klux Klan, they will tell you.

What’s the world’s most diseased country?

GerMany.

These are ear-retcal jokes...

Fail.

Me: Imagine not having hair.

Kids: On chemo.

Bitch the fuck.

My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.

What did the kid with cancer say? "Can-I see my mom one more time?"

Why does my cheating ex-wife wear a colostomy bag?

She lost her ass playing poker...

Why did Kristen Stewart fart on the set of Charlie's Angels? Because she ate too much damn chili for breakfast I made for her. I just forgot to put my foot in it.

Q. What's the difference between fucking a coma patient and fucking a cabbage?

A. You have to cut a hole in the cabbage.

Roses are blue, violets are blue.

What? Ohh, shit!!!!!! I hate having dyslexia!

Why couldn't the girl brush her hair?

..... She had cancer.... ;)

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed.

One fell off and bumped his head.

The momma called the doctor and the doctor said,

"Why the heck were my children jumping on a bed?"