HA jokes
What type of phones do orphans have?
IPhone XR—it has no home button.
Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?
Because he has ALL of the booty!
What do you give a pig when it has a rash?
Oinkment.
Jace: Haha, I won, dude. You suck at Monopoly!
Timmy: Let's play another game. *GUNSHOT* I guess I won!
Jace: *SCREAMS IN PAIN*
Timmy: What? I thought we were playing Chutes and Ladders!
I live next to a kindergarten, and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.
Memes
Hi 👋 ooooo has tyyyyyyyyuyuyu
If I had a dime for every time someone has told me to kill myself, I'd be a millionaire.
What did the hamster say to the penis? "Ha, you look just like me!"
POV: 11:07 PM At night, reading these when you notice that, like everyone else, you have no life.
Why is Ronnie Anne in love with Lincoln? Because he has a fat nugen.
Guys, this has to stop. Let's tell their parents. Oh wait...
What do Myspace and my dad have in common?
I haven't seen them in a while.
If you play FNF, I play a game because he has two balls, boi.
Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.
This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉
I reached into my pocket and pulled out a rectal thermometer and thought,
"Some asshole has my pen!"
Penaldo song 🎵🎵🎵
He has conquered all the Farmers. He is never going to stop. From Lithuania down to Andorra, He has scored a fucking lot. Penalties and Tapins, The Fields of Faroe Islands, He is our GOAT, And his name is Cristiano Columbus. Allez, Allez, Allez Allez, Allez, Allez
I took my sister and cousin to a sleepover with lil Diddy, who my dad's friend has connections with.
I think the experience went fine, but they were traumatized. We got what we wanted.
My daughter has been writing letters asking Satan for gifts. Imagine my shock when I realized she has dyslexia.
Stephen Hawking doesn’t have a dick; he has a microchip.
What cookie has an orphan never had?
Homemade.