Guy

Guy jokes

Hacker

A guy who just got robbed says, "I've been hacked, and the hacker ransomware!"

Prize

Did you know about the guy who invented knock knock jokes?

He won the no-Bell prize.

Pain

Look, Bono is a great guy, but shopping with him is a pain, because he still hasn't found what he is looking for.

Train

German XP farms: Train carrying chained guys.

American XP farms: Walking up to a school with a gun.

African XP farms: Cotton field.

Memes

Pedophile

Two guys in a car get pulled over by a cop. The cop taps the window, and the window rolls down. "Good evening, gentlemen, we're looking for two pedophiles."

The guy quickly closes the window. Ten seconds later, he lowers it again and says, "Ok, we'll do it."

Personal space

Bro sat down too close for comfort. I told him to move or he would get hurt.

Come on, how hard could it possibly be To move a few inches? You’re touching my D.

A guy really needs his personal space. Disobey and I’ll shove it in your face.

Contest

I went home one day and see a few married guys in line in my sister's room. I ask what's going on, my sister is running a contest. The contest is the married guys lick her pussy and guess what she had for breakfast. The winner gets a free blowjob. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder that she thought that she made up that contest.

Syndrome

How did the guys with Down syndrome split the dinner bill? They all made a down payment.

Dad

This guy called anonymous said he's going to own me like he did my mum. Joke's on him, I have two dads.

Kid

Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.

Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.

Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.

High-five

What happened when the Japanese guy offered Logan Paul a high five?

He left him hanging.

Prayer

A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.

Girl

Short girl: "How do you see up there?"

Tall guy: "Who said that?"

I spit my drink out and then ran away.

Difference

What is the difference between a guy with cancer and the Twin Towers?

Nothing, they both fell.

Boyfriend

During this COVID shit, if a guy starts following you with the masks on, should you be scared, or is that dumb bastard just your boyfriend?