Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesnt pay anymore.
3 people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: "Local calls are free".
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Asian man goes to the eye doctor. Doctor says, "It looks like you have a cataract." Asian guy says, "No Doc, I drive a Rincoln."
What type of people think rape jokes are funny?
Only the coolest people in the world! I fucking love you guys 😂
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
So a guy is evading the draft, the cops bang on his door and he runs out the back and through and alley way onto a road. He finds a nun and asks if he can hide under her blouse, she complies and the cops walk by and dont see them. The man comes back up from under the nuns blouse and says”Hey man, youve got a pair of balls!” The nun says, “I didnt wanna be drafted either....”
"What's your name, son?" The principal asked his student. The kid replied, "D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir." "Do you have a stutter?" the principal asked. The student answered, "No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk."
Why’d the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the gay (guys/girls) house. (Wait awhile) then ask “knock knock?” Other person says “Who’s there?” A: the chicken
What do you say to a guy with Down syndrome who’s on Top of a sky scraper , jump
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Someone in London is stabbed every two minutes. Poor guy.
a man was in a court room, the judge said, ''what should this mans punishment be?'' a random guy ''OFF WITH HIS HEAD'' judge ''he shall give head to every man in this room'' the guy ''WAIT THATS NOT WHAT I SAID!!!''
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
A man walks into a rooftop bar and takes a seat next to another guy. “What are you drinking?” he asks the guy.
“Super Power Beer,” he says.
“Oh, yeah? I doubt it?”
Then he shows him: He swigs some beer, dives off the roof, and lands with no damage what so ever. He walks back into the bar.
“Amazing!” the man says. “Let me have some!” The man grabs the beer. He drinks it, jumps off the roof —and falls 15 stories to the ground. Splat. The barman says. “You know, you’re a real idiot when you’re drunk, Superman.”
Did you hear about the guy who got a tattoo of an octopus?
He got inked up.
Q. How much cum does a gay guy have A. A butt load
I was 11 or 12 at the time.
Guy (passing me): How are you doing? Me, an autist: Pretty bad honestly. Guy (continued walking past me) Me: ...
If you didn’t know, “what’s up” and “how are you doing” are phatic expressions in the United States, meaning that they’re said as greetings even though they literally mean something else.
