Gun jokes

There was an animal on my porch, then I shot it in the head. It was strange that it had coffee in its hand. I flipped it over, and it was an animal, but it looked a lot like my kid.

I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?

Kurt Cobain's microphone.

One of the students reported a school shooting.

That fucking snitch...

When you are sleeping in class and the shooter sees you, then they wake you up and say, "Let’s team up," like, what the f*ck?

Am tired of my country!!!! How can two policemen use one gun?

What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?

When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.

Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday. He gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it.

I asked him what the bullseye was for. He said, "Target practice."

I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun, now it's an assault rifle.

My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.

I went fishing with my grandpa, and my fishing line caught the attention of a school of fish. I told him to get my gun.

A black man said, "Where are the young ones?"

What's a gun's favorite type of literature?

Magazine.

The school shooter encounters the emo kid. He reaches for his gun, but the emo kid disappears. He then finds that his gun is not on him.

What's a lesbian's favorite weapon?

A finger-gun👉👌

Why are clips 30 rounds? Because that's the average class size.

What’s the difference between a gun and liberals?

Guns only have one trigger.

I'm gonna blow out your lungs faster than Joe Biden thinks is possible with a 9mm.

I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

What's America's best class?

Gun 101.

What do Americans call high school?

A shooting range.

Name what guns are used for. {wrong answers only?}