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Guess

Guess jokes

My son said that bully needs a pounding, then I say, "Yeah, right, that is what I said and did to your mother." My son opens his mouth and freezes. I guess he knew what I was talking about.

How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.

My joke: You have to guess, answers come at 3:00. Why did the cow jump into space?

Hint... it smelled its favorite food 🍱 and saw its future!

That hint was technically the whole answer. Can you guess in 3 hours? Lol, I will be posting every time, and my giveaway starts at 5:00: my mega fly ride bat dragon 🐉 and five jungle eggs.

A: What's the difference between a toilet and a washing basin?

B: I don't know.

A: Then I guess your house looks beautiful...

B: ...

I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.

A mom gave her son "the talk". Her son replies, "Wait, so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied."

We the jury are yet to deliver our final verdict, but we would like to have a guess.

Is it Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick in the library?

What do you call Shroud when he is hurt?

ShrOWd.

Guess what, Shroud is back on wje, I don't know why, but he is...

What do you call a stabbed pig?

Porkchopped.

What is a pig's favorite Food Network channel?

Pork Chopped!

Hah, got 'em (I guess)!

A: Guess what kind of men/women do gold diggers like?

Q: One that has a sense of money.

Some dude called me a tool.

So later I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend.

Guess he was right :/

It was pornography class, and there was a break.

Two adults were "having a good time" till the teacher says...

Teacher: Hey! SAY ALL THE NUMBERS TO 10,000 NOW!

Adult 1: How about I say my ABC's?

Teacher: Go ahead, I guess...

Adult 1: A B C E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Teacher: Where's the D?

Adult 2: Inside me...

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    • Part 1: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

    Part 2: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

    Part 3: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

    Part 4: Guess what... two men were walking down the way when the second one fell in the sewers and died... The first one was lonely.

    I tend to think my ‘depression’ is for attention. I guess I have depressed depression.

    They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.

    I told my wife she was lousy in bed.

    She replied, "I guess you have been seeing your ex-girlfriend, uh?"