Guess

Guess jokes

Mother

  • My son said that bully needs a pounding, then I say, "Yeah, right, that is what I said and did to your mother." My son opens his mouth and freezes. I guess he knew what I was talking about.

  • 0
  • Woman

  • How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.

    Cow

  • My joke: You have to guess, answers come at 3:00. Why did the cow jump into space?

    Hint... it smelled its favorite food 🍱 and saw its future!

    That hint was technically the whole answer. Can you guess in 3 hours? Lol, I will be posting every time, and my giveaway starts at 5:00: my mega fly ride bat dragon 🐉 and five jungle eggs.

  • 3
  • Difference

  • A: What's the difference between a toilet and a washing basin?

    B: I don't know.

    A: Then I guess your house looks beautiful...

    B: ...

    The talk

  • A mom gave her son "the talk". Her son replies, "Wait, so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied."

  • 4
  • Verdict

  • We the jury are yet to deliver our final verdict, but we would like to have a guess.

    Is it Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick in the library?

    Pig

  • What do you call a stabbed pig?

    Porkchopped.

    What is a pig's favorite Food Network channel?

    Pork Chopped!

    Hah, got 'em (I guess)!

    Tool

  • Some dude called me a tool.

    So later I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend.

    Guess he was right :/

  • 1
  • Pornography

  • It was pornography class, and there was a break.

    Two adults were "having a good time" till the teacher says...

    Teacher: Hey! SAY ALL THE NUMBERS TO 10,000 NOW!

    Adult 1: How about I say my ABC's?

    Teacher: Go ahead, I guess...

    Adult 1: A B C E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

    Teacher: Where's the D?

    Adult 2: Inside me...

  • 0
  • Man

  • Part 1: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

    Part 2: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

    Part 3: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

    Part 4: Guess what... two men were walking down the way when the second one fell in the sewers and died... The first one was lonely.