Grandpa Jokes

I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

I'm so proud of my Grandpa. He killed Hitler himself.

I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike I just collect body parts

When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandpa did., not screaming and shouting ike his passengers.

My grandpa may be a pedo but at least he slows down in the school car park

A mom gave her son "the talk". her son replies "wait so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Your hairline and my grandpa go way back

I'll always remember my grandpa's last words

Are you getting the knife

I can’t watch anime anymore when my friends grandpa is in the house

He hasn’t heard a Japanese person scream since the war

Frank: I am named frank because my grandpa lived in Frankfurt during his best years. Finley: I am named Finley because my grandmother was in Finland during her early twenties! Mia: Can we please change the subject?

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

My dads the oldest and when he was young he shot my grandpas balls off but I thought about it how does my dad have younger brothers

My grandpa told me I was too dependent on devices. I told him he was a hypocrite and unplugged him from his life support.

Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks... "Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"

"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."

Do you knows the tv show naked and afraid wall that’s what my grandpa and me played when I was young

My grandpa kept warning the people on the Titanic that the boat was going to sink. Result: he got kicked out of the movie theater

You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!