One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said "The Mail Man died".
knock knock "Who's there" Not your grandpa he crashed the plane
My teacher asked everyone how tall their grandparents were, I responded "My grandpa is 5ft 10, and my grandma is -6ft."
when my grandpa was 65 he decided to run a mile a day to keep fit.
he's 70 now and we have no idea where he is
my grandpa unplugged the AC so i unplugged his life support
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Cashew
A mom gave her son "the talk". her son replies "wait so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied.
We just found out Grandpa is addicted to Viagra. No one is taking it harder than Grandma.
You marry a single mother with an adult daughter. Now, your father marries the daughter. So, your father is your son now, because he is married to your daughter-in-law. But as your father's son and your father's father, you're your own grandpa!
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimers." Boy: "What's that?" Grandpa: "What's what?"
My grandpa is a great hero. He's the one who shot Hitler.
When you’re walking through the garden section at Walmart and you hear your grandpa screaming “They’re in the fucking trees!”
I was crying at school and telling my friends that my grandpa died. Then I told them I still remember his last words, they wanted to hear them. They are: you still holding the ladder
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip and he died that was the last thing we did together and I will never forget his last words “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS”
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said "I inherited a watering hole." Bewildered I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?" "I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
My grandpa personally killed 3 German pilots. He was the worst mechanic Luftwaffe had.
Grandpa's last words,why do you have a chain saw
Grandpa said no phone near the table so I said your not allowed near the school
My grandpa died in 9/11 he crashed a plane
My Dad said he got me from the Shops and I remembered what grandpa said about him
