Government

Government jokes

Teacher

    • A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.”

    “I still don't get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed. In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, "OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!"

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    • Government memes

    Politics

    • A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" The dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your mother, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the working class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense."

    The little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has soiled his diaper. The little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.

    The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now." The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."

    The little boy replies, "Well, while capitalism is screwing the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep shit."

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    • Libertarian Party

    • The Libertarian Party was founded in 1971, and the Libertarian Party has lost every presidential election since 1972, and according to the Libertarian Party the Libertarian Party is the only political party in the United States that is the party of principle. If the Libertarian Party is the party of principle then why hasn't the Libertarian Party won a presidential election since 1972?

    Because it is politically motivated.

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    • Bill

    • How to decorate a wall:

    Strip off the paper and original plaster.

    Put on fresh plaster and wallpaper.

    Paint it (if you want).

    Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply.

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    • Voter

    • A day in the life of a Biden voter.

    $2000 stimulus check? Nah, $1400...some day.

    No more kids in cages? Nah, more kids in cages.

    $15 minimum wage? Nah, $11. Maybe.

    50k loan forgiveness? Nah. Lol.

    No more deportations? Nah, they're still leaving.

    Women's rights? Nah, dudes in women's sports.

    New COVID bill? Nah, mostly bailouts and pet projects.

    Cheap insulin? Nah, jack those prices up.

    Defeat fascism? Nah, barbed wire fences around DC.

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