Government jokes
Donald Trump.
It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.
The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick.
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
As the coronavirus pandemic strengthens...
Trump - "Quick, inject yourselves with bleach!"
Also Trump - "I order everyone in America to wear a face mask except for me!"
Putin's Brain:
What do the initials CIA stand for?
Central Intelligence of A**holes.
How can one make Death Row a little more fun?
Musical electric chairs.
What's the main similarity between an elementary school math class and the USA?
The class divides.
Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"
This joke's short just like Joe Biden's penis.
Oh wait, if I were to make a joke to the size of Joe Biden's penis, I wouldn't write a joke.
What do you get when you cross a penis with a potato?
A dictator.
What is the chair's favorite person?
A sit-izen.
Cruel and unusual punishment.
If you own a gun and you live in the USA, hide your gun upstairs. Biden can't get it.
Biden: *falls over on steps*
Why do US suck at chess? We lost both our towers.
Why is England so good at chess? They still have their queen.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
What does Donald Trump say when he declares war? Nuke them.
What does a pervert say when he declares war? Nude them.
Who were the greenest Presidents in US history? The Bushes.
Why can't British people play chess?
Because they lost their queen.