Government jokes
"John FK, he think he special car no top, everyone see like he on parade. Me, I stay hidden, secret style, no bullets find me. Much smar smarter, no? Scret lifestyle safety."
Who are voting for this election? I'm voting for Tricity, so vote for Tricity. Electricity!
How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With Caesar!
Being unemployed is like watching our president fall over himself on the stairs.
There’s no hope.
How do you anger a Libertarian?
Don't tell him the truth.
If you think of a president as your king, then the USA got checkmated on November 22nd, 1963.
It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.
"Welcome to the gulag."
Your Mom is so fat, she could be Trump's border wall.
Why was the soldier reading the Geneva convention?
To-do list.
Why doesn't the U.S. Government play Clash of Clans?
Because they lost two towers already.
Trump did 1/6.
Where did George go?
Washington, D.C.
Your hairline was so fat that Joe Biden could not make it prime minister.
Long live the quee—Oh wait...
What is the difference between a Libertarian and a dumb polack?
Not much difference.
If you mixed the Iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad, what would you get?
Tony Abbott's career.
I'm gonna blow out your lungs faster than Joe Biden thinks is possible with a 9mm.
Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?
A: His lips move.
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.