Government

Government jokes

Printer

Trump is going too far.

He deported a printer because it didn't have papers.

  • 3
  • Pentagon

    The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, ...

    so Trump can't tweet it.

  • 2
  • Dick

    A little known rule: You cannot be circumcised if you are running for political office in the US.

    You need to be a complete dick.

    Memes

    Office

    We're skipping April Fools' Day this year. The biggest joke is already sitting in office running our country.

    President

    We all know that Lincoln and Kennedy are the most open-minded presidents in the world.

    Brownie

    Joe Biden walks into the White House kitchen.

    "Are those brownies I smell?" he asks.

    "Indeed, they are," he was told.

    "Gee," he says, "they smell nothing like Girl Scouts!"

    Alien

    Why did Mexicans go to Area 51?

    To show them what a real illegal alien looks like.

    President

    What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?

    The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!

    Taliban

    If you ever feel useless... Just remember that if you ever feel useless... Just remember that it took the US 4 presidents, trillions of dollars, thousands of lives, and 20 years to replace the Taliban with... the Taliban.

    Corona

    Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.

    Corona did what Trump promised.

    Joe Biden

    Government Briefing:

    Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today...

    ...He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.

    Rose

    Roses are red, potato chips are savory...

    The United States prison system is legalized slavery.

    Assassination

    I was rooting for Donald Trump to be president.

    We haven't had a presidential assassination in a while.

    Lover

    What do you call two female lovers spying on the government?

    Lesbionage.