Why are Communists considered the left?
Because they can’t do anything right.
Government Jokes
What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?
Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.
King.
So one day, I took a trip to Russia and saw Vladimir Putin walking in the streets without any bodyguards. Seeing as how I looked just like him, we switched places for a few days.
After two days, some officer came up to me and asked if we were going to project блять, and I said yes, and the officer said, "God help us."
So a day later, I heard on the news that every other continent and the moon were destroyed. I then approached the officer and said, "I thought you meant we were having a giant orgy." He said, "We did, and that we were extremely drunk."
If Trump was an orphan, I know he would know not to build a wall because he was in one most of his life.
When you see your friend, you call the police, but they just moan.
9/11 happened... right?
The cops respond to 9-1-1... coincidence, I think not.
What's so wrong about Trump being in office?
He steals all the cats.
How many communists does it take to change a lightbulb? Never enough.
Trump's cabinet are like panties. Some crawl up your butt, some snap under pressure, and some actually cover your butt when you need them.
Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids.
"Knuckle babies" don't eat.
Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives.
Condoms 99 percent effective.
Birth control 99 percent effective.
Etc.
Just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time (only cost 20 years in jail ;)
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts.
Who are cats going to vote for in November? Hillary Kitten.
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.
Good morning, madam. I am from the local council. Can you please tell me if you have a dog license for that poodle you have on your head?
Scientist time travels into the year 2024.
Scientist: So, what happened with the storming of Area 51?
Pedestrian: Oh, you mean The 51 Massacre?
What is the difference between an American and an orphan?
They don't have a home to get their guns.
"Trump is Putin, America first!" hahaha
Where did the king hide his armies?
In his sleevies.
Worst joke ever.
