Government jokes
Texans: Don't mess with Texas.
*snows 1 inch*
Texans: Please help us, President Biden!
What starts with "P" and ends with "E" and has a million letters?
Post Office.
Why does Donald Trump smell like dog shit? Cuz he's a dawg!
If Hillary and Biden got locked in a room together, all they would talk about is how to ruin America and make a plan to steal children.
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
How would Stephen Hawking get rid of the police?
Go to the junkyard.
Why do orphans prefer the monarchy?
Because they could feel the warm[th] of the royal family.
NASA equals nugget and sh*t, amateur.
Donald Trump is getting all the perks of 2020. He got COVID and lost his job.
He do American feel like Trump is the president, he is stupid like soup.
Brother 2: We have these weird circles on the street! Government is tracking us!!!
Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And it's the government.
Brother 2: Then why are there two in the left turn lane?
Brother 1: So one car isn't always going left and stopping the others.
Brother 2: Then why are they one car apart? Oh, to have three people going.
Brother 1: Correct. When I see one car on the first, I go on the second so my light changes.
Brother 2: You monster.
Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight?
Brother 2: HA. Yo mama would trigger the sensor.
Brother 1: ARG. It's OUR MAMA you're disrespecting.
Mother (brother 1): What's going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY!
Brother 2: I think you should take your pills.
Brother 1: Found them.
*imaginary mother and brother fade away*
Thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him.
Btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.
Q: Why did China take over Tibet? A: Because they china exploit foreign resources and keep it for themselves like bitch ass jerks.
Btw, these are real facts despite the CCP ́s propagandist narratives. #FreeTibet #FreeHongKong #FreeInnerMongolia #FreeUyghers
Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it's forbidden!
What do you get when you cross a Cuban and corrupt dictator, Fidel Castro?
Information has been leaked from government sources. When the current lock-up ends, the holder of the nation's purse, Fishi Rucksack, will launch a new initiative.
This will be to help the struggling "personal services" industry and will be labelled, "Sleep out to Help out."
Biden is a joke. Trump is AMAZINGLY AWESOME!
Why are Democrats represented by the donkey? Because some Democrats can be such an ass!
Unlike the Americans, Hitler knew when to kill himself.
What is the strongest weapon in India?
The red button (this is a fact).
How do you find out about the accomplishments of the former president of the United States James Earl Carter?
Read the label on the jar of Skippy peanut butter.