What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
Secret code that Bin Laden sent to Obama but couldn't decipher!
It was eloHssA OllEH!!
Me: punching a kid.
My FBI agent: You're adopted.
Why did Trump's brain cross the road?
Oh wait, there is no other side.
What did Trump rename the Presidential plane?
Answer: Hair Force One!
Who's the cutest president in the world?
Kim Jong Un, chh💕💕💕
I don't say funny stuff because I'm afraid they will take the German passport from me.
"Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a computer screen, and then they can see the government has to get Chili's."
As the coronavirus pandemic strengthens...
Trump - "Quick, inject yourselves with bleach!"
Also Trump - "I order everyone in America to wear a face mask except for me!"
Yo mama is so dumb, she sits on Trump's wall 24 hours every day.
When I try to call my friend, I can't get through because my name is Lin Kon, and the operator keeps saying, "Yes, Mr. President."
Donald Trump is a good president and not a complete moron.
What do a politician and a minister have in common?
Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.
What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS?
If you stop giving money to a church, you won't go to prison.
Why did the United Nations stop the French government from using the guillotine in public?
Because the French government was using the guillotine on newborn babies for circumcision.
Trump said: "Let's make America great again."
Translation by Democrats:
"Let's fake America again."
The streets go blank in the dead of the day, not a car to be seen.
A kingdom of corona-cation, and it looks like mom's the queen.
The wind is howling with this virus in the air.
Couldn't keep it in China, everyone knows it's everywhere.
Don't let friends in, don't be afraid.
Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal, don't feel your insanity, that the virus caused!
Don't let it go! Don't let it go! You have to hold it back a little more! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Turn away and slam your doors!
I don't care what the government says! Let me go to my friend's house.
Sickness doesn't get to me anyway.
It's funny how some distance makes everyone insane, and the fears that once controlled me are here and present, oh well!
It's time to see what I can do to test the limits and break through!
No right, no wrong, but stay inside!
WE'RE NOT FREE!!
Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Be one with the peace inside!! Don't let it go! Don't let it go! Watch sad movies and cry!! Here I stand!! And here I'll stay!! 'Cause I have nothing better to do.
The virus flurries through the air into my house!
The storm is spiraling, fear and fractals all around!!
And one thought makes you wanna scream and shout out loud!!
What if we never go back? What if the past is in the past????
DON'T LET IT GO DON'T LET IT GO!! And you'll rise at the break of noon! DON'T LET IT GO DON'T LET IT GO!! That's morning girl is gone!! HERE I STAND IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT 'CAUSE THAT'S WHEN I WOKE UP!! Let the virus rage on!!!!!! The sickness never gets to me anyway. DING.
Imagine if on April first the government says, "Hahhaha, you all fell for it. Covid-19 is fake; we actually killed all those people, lol."
Covid 19 stopped mass shootings faster than the Government.
Somebody told me to go to hell, so I walked up to Donald Trump.
