Government jokes
What is the strongest weapon in India?
The red button (this is a fact).
How do you find out about the accomplishments of the former president of the United States James Earl Carter?
Read the label on the jar of Skippy peanut butter.
Biden
Biden: Shut up, Trump, disrespectful!
President: You are the one with the inappropriate hair touching, bro. 😎😎😎😎😎😎
Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.
Why can't Chinese do anything? The government won't let them.
God- make a grumpy old man president.
Angel- why?
G- cause I said so-name him Trump.
A- okay.
G- make him not pay taxes.
A- okay...
Fast forward to 2020
G- you know that grumpy old man?
A- yea...
G- make him create a deadly virus named after a beer.
A- Krona.
G- exactly.
A- why do you hate humans so much?
G- because I can.
Why did Mexicans go to Area 51?
To show them what a real illegal alien looks like.
If Trump pooped in a toilet, the toilet would die.
Am tired of my country!!!! How can two policemen use one gun?
Biden 2020.
What did Darth Trump Vader say to evil emperor Putin?
Yessssss, MEaster!
Alfred the Great was arguably the greatest king in England’s history.
The worst? Richard the Goat Fucker.
What's Barack Obama's favorite vegetable? It's Barack-olli.
What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
Secret code that Bin Laden sent to Obama but couldn't decipher!
It was eloHssA OllEH!!
Me: punching a kid.
My FBI agent: You're adopted.
Why did Trump's brain cross the road?
Oh wait, there is no other side.
What did Trump rename the Presidential plane?
Answer: Hair Force One!
Who's the cutest president in the world?
Kim Jong Un, chh💕💕💕
I don't say funny stuff because I'm afraid they will take the German passport from me.