What did the baseball chief say to the Orphan?
GO HOME!
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
I don't know, go google it.
Why do I go around making orphan jokes? Because they can't go crying to their parents. 😅
Denki: Hey Mineta, I have a joke.
Mineta: ...go on...
Denki: Ochako's booty.
Mineta: I don't get it?
Denki: Exactly.
Mineta: *cries T_T*
I love taking my daughter out in the car. Every time we go over a speed bump, I tell her we ran over another dog. 😂
I was going to tell a 9/11 joke, but it was really plane.
I was going to kill them with kindness, but then I realized using a knife is a lot faster.
Me having a good day. Going on a walk on a peaceful day.
My depression: hey, what's up!
Me: go away.
My depression: well how rude.
Me: 🙄.
My depression: remember that one time......
Me: no, don't even.
My depression: that we.....
Me: nope.
My depression: *says really fast*: said that one stupid joke that wasn't funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilled water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like you do every single night.
Me: 😳😶😟.
My depression: 😉 don't worry I'll always be here for you.
My sister was hitting on my boyfriend. I'm 11, she's 9. She said, "Go f-ck yourself," so I said, "Okay, thanks for the idea!"
Brother 2: We have these weird circles on the street! Government is tracking us!!!
Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And it's the government.
Brother 2: Then why are there two in the left turn lane?
Brother 1: So one car isn't always going left and stopping the others.
Brother 2: Then why are they one car apart? Oh, to have three people going.
Brother 1: Correct. When I see one car on the first, I go on the second so my light changes.
Brother 2: You monster.
Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight?
Brother 2: HA. Yo mama would trigger the sensor.
Brother 1: ARG. It's OUR MAMA you're disrespecting.
Mother (brother 1): What's going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY!
Brother 2: I think you should take your pills.
Brother 1: Found them.
*imaginary mother and brother fade away*
Thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him.
Btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.
You can get into a fight with an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What are the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights?
They are both going to be hanging from a tree.
Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it's forbidden!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus.
I bOi jug go CMC?
If Tim goes to heaven and Tom goes to hell, where does Tam go?
Up your ass.
I was going to log a pun about trees, but you wooden understand it.
I was playing baseball with orphans, but when they hit a homerun, they had nowhere to go.
Why didn't the orange go to the doctor?
Because he had vitamin C.
If this is offensive to anyone, I'm sorry! Hey, wanna see something funny? Go look in your mirror!
