Girl

Girl jokes

Ugliness

So a girl says, "You're so ugly to me," and she says, "I’m the prettiest girl." I say, "Yeah, a pretty girl for an ogre 👹!"

Mom

What's similar between a pregnant 14 y/o girl and the foetus inside of her?

They both are thinking "My mom's gonna kill me!"

Sex

What was blue and black and doesn't like to have sex... The little girl in my trunk.

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  • Pedophile

    A pedophile is at a school parent night. He's holding hands with an eight-year-old girl when he's approached by another parent. She says to him, "Oh, what a darling little girl you have there." The pedophile replies, "No," then points his finger to a child across the room and says, "That's my child."

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  • Memes

    Family Reunion

    A white guy was telling his friend about this girl he hooked up with. His friend asks, "Did you get her number?"

    He replies, "No, but it's okay, I'll see her at the next family reunion!"

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  • Mirror

    At school, this gurl was like, "You're ugly!" And I'm like, "Gurl, your mirror cracks the moment you step in front of it."

    Difference

    Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?

    A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.

    Principal

    Boy: The principal is so dumb!

    Girl: Do you know who I am?

    Boy: No...

    Girl: I am the principal's daughter!

    Boy: Do you know who I am?

    Girl: No...

    Boy: Good! *Walks away*

    Indian

    There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"

    The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."

    The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”

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  • Man

    Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.

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  • Bathroom

    A little girl walks into the bathroom and sees her mom naked taking a shower and asks, "Mommy, mommy, when am I gonna get breasts?" Mom says, "Oh, when you're 12 or 13." The little girl looks down and see’s her pubes and asks, "Mommy, mommy, when am I gonna get hair down there?" Mom says, "Oh, about the same time you get breasts."

    Then the little girl walks in and sees her dad sitting on the bed with a hard on and asks, "Daddy, daddy, when am I gonna get one of those?" Dad says, "Soon as your mom leaves for work."

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  • Rape

    How do you make a little girl cry for a second time?

    By wiping her blood off your dick with her teddy bear.

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  • Car

    A man driving along a country road sees a little girl crying next to a cliff. He gets out and says, "Aw, what's the matter little girl?"

    She points off the cliff, and at the bottom is the family car, burning with everyone inside, all mangled and dead.

    The man unbuckles his pants and says, "Little girl, today just ain't your day."

    Orphanage

    In my locality, there was an orphanage but everybody in the locality was really sexist too, so they had to change the orphanage into a brothel 'cause everybody took the boys away and nobody was taking the girls and the manager didn't want to waste any 14-year-old pussy, did he?

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  • Timmy

    A guy goes to Starbucks and asks, "Hey, if I can make you laugh, I don’t have to pay." The girl in the window says, "Okay." The guy says, "A little boy named Timmy lost his arms." The girl says, "Oh no!" The guy says, "And his dad left him when he was 4." The girl says, "Uhh yeah." The guy says, "Okay, I guess I’ll be paying then." The girl asks, "Okay, and what name will that be under?" The guy says, "Timmy, I’m Timmy."

    Sex

    I was at a bar. The girl said, "Sex, sex, free sex tonight," when she really said, "663629."

    Syndrome

    I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I wanted my first time to be special.