Get jokes
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Your mum is so fat, when she was in front of my apartment, I couldn't get in.
Person 1: A life.
Person 2: I don't get it.
Person 1: Exactly.
What do orphans get on Xmas?
Lonely.
What do you get when you cross a Jamaican with a ginger?
A gingerbread man.
REBEL!!!!!
Mom, start eating, or else you will get fatter!
Where would Batman get his freak on at? The Batcave or the bat strip club?
What do you get when you cross a pig with a cactus? A porkupine!
I have kleptomania. But when it gets bad, I take something for it.
8 bit: Are you ok?
7 bit: Yes, I’m just a bit off...
Get it? 8 bits = a byte :)
Why can't weapons play baseball?
Because they need to get to home base.
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.
What did Osama get on his test when he was a kid? A 9/11.
It's gonna take a step stool to get a blow job.
Say the drive through at McDonald's, order (don't say the sake) but when you get it ask them, "My sake?" and say, "Sake that ass."
How do you get rid of a fat ghost? You exercise it.
Waitress: What can I get for you?
Me: I'll have a steak.
Waitress: How would you like it?
Me: Immediately!
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
What did Warner Brothers get for making that horrible Joker sequel?
They got what they fucking deserved!!!!!!!!