Double Entendre jokes

Plane

  • On September 11, 2001, I was in geometry class.

    On that day, we learned you can remove one side of a pentagon by intersecting it with a plane.

  • 0
  • Boy

  • A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it's too long." Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you'll never get it."

  • 15
  • Dictate

  • One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"

  • 9
  • Stripper

  • Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?

    A: It's cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're pretty much screwed.

  • 3
  • Anal Sex

  • What's the difference between Clint Eastwood and anal sex?

    One will make your day, and the other will make your hole weak.

  • 3
  • Rooster

  • What's the difference between a gay rooster and a straight rooster?

    Straight rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo."

    A gay rooster says, "Any cock will do."

  • 1
  • Nun

  • Three nuns die in a car crash, but they all make it to heaven. They're standing at the pearly gates, and Saint Peter says to them, "Don't worry, you're going to get in, but first I need you to answer these questions."

    He asks the first nun, "What was the name of the first woman?" The nun says, "Eve." Saint Peter says, "Go on in."

    Then he asks the second nun, "Where did Adam and Eve live?" The second one says, "The Garden of Eden." Saint Peter says, "You can go through."

    Finally, he gets to the third nun and says, "What was the first thing Eve said to Adam?" The nun stands there a little confused and says, "Boy, that's a hard one." Saint Peter, shocked, goes, "That's correct! Go on in."

  • 0
  • Candy

  • There are some questionable candies out there, such as:

    "All I want is a good Blow Pop."

    "I don’t even want to know where that Butterfinger has been."

    "If you do, you’ll probably end up with tasting the rainbow."

    "Nobody wants to bite into an O’Henry."

    "Or adopt Three Musketeers."

    "Or even end up with a Sour Patch."

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  • Gay Man

  • How do you know you broke into a gay man’s house?

    The weird moaning sounds when you try to slide in the back door.

    Followed by slipping in Kentucky (KY) Jelly.

    Followed by landing in deep shit.

    Followed by being totally covered in sea men.

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