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Dark Humor is like a child with cancer. It never gets old.

What's the difference between a baby and a salad?

Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.

What do you call a pregnant slave? Buy one get one free.

What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.

I don't like the word "gun".

Whenever I say it, people always get triggered.

The image shows a four-panel meme. Each panel has a different scenario, with a crying, angry-looking character on the left and a TV screen on the right. The text next to the crying character in each panel says "THAT'S RACIST!" Each panel has a different statement. First panel, text says "Why is the black guy the villain?". Second panel, text says "Why does the black guy have to get shot?". Third panel, text says "Why is it only black people killing each other?". Fourth panel, text says "Why are there no black people in this movie?". The TV screen in each panel depicts a different scenario. Panel 1 shows a black person pointing a gun at a white person. Panel 2 shows a white person pointing a gun at a black person. Panel 3 shows a black person pointing a gun at a black person. Panel 4 shows a white person pointing a gun at a white person.

Little Johnny catches his parents going at it and says, "Hey dad! Whatcha doin'?"

His father says, "I'm filling your mom's tank."

Johnny says, "Oh yeah, well, you better get a model that gets better mileage because the milk man filled her up this morning."

Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some marijuana. Jack got high and slapped her thigh and said "you know you wanna". Jill said yes, pulled down her dress, and then they had some fun. Silly Jill forgot the pill and now they have a son.

Tell a dark joke to an orphan, then hit them. They'll get the punchline right away.

What did the woman with no hands get for Christmas? No idea. She hasn't opened her present yet.

*on a date*

me - "I get to work with animals all day."

her - "How sweet! What do you do?"

me - "I'm a butcher."

How do you get four prostitutes on one chair?

You turn it upside down.

Person A: C'mon person B, just be happy, smile.

Person B: Over my dead body.

Person B: *gets the noose*

How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?

He forgot to wrap his Whopper.

What's the difference between an emo kid and a pack of Oreos? The bar code on the emo kid gets longer every day.

I don't get why cancer is so hard to beat. I'm already on stage 4.

A girl and a dog were dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog.

Anyone else on here looking at depressing jokes to make themselves feel better? Not that it's working, but it's nice to know that I'm not alone. Well, enough with the sob story, I gotta go get my razors. See ya in the long run.