Get jokes

One of my earliest memories is seeing my mother's face through the oven window as we played hide and seek, and she said: "You're getting warmer!"

I have kleptomania. But when it gets bad, I take something for it.

I hate sitting in traffic, I always get run over.

What does the ocean do to its friends? It waves. (*Sorry, I wasn’t making any jokes for a while. I was getting sick of this thing.*)

I am sooooooo bored, Gwen, can you please get on, or anybody, since I'm weirdly obsessed with Gwen.

Katgod, can you get your girlfriend? She's messing with me, and I'm gonna hurt soon.

So an ace gets handed a piece of paper and it says, "Do you like me or no?" and the ace says, "I'm not registered to vote!" Hahahahahahahahjajqh.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apes get picked.

How do you throw a space party?

You plan-et! Hahahaha, get it?

What month of the year has 28 days?

Answer: All of them.

When you get to feel a dick in you, then suck bro, all your stress [goes] out the window.

Q: What do you get from a two-legged cow? A: Lean beef.

What gets wetter as it dries?

A towel!

It's gonna take a step stool to get a blow job.

You're so short that you don't have to open the front door to get inside the house.

----> [] get in the door.

My name is Devonair.

When I get a haircut, it's always bald.

Kids make fun of me, they call me "dang-near bald head."

My name is Devonair *dev-on-near*

I always thought they were making fun of me because of my name pronounced near.

Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.

The lasagna I just cooked is for me, my friends, and family. You don't get none because your name is not on the list. You wanna know why? 'Cause you got the whole place smelling like catdog and ass.

Where would Batman get his freak on at? The Batcave or the bat strip club?