Get jokes
A mirror and a beer bottle are arguing.
The beer bottle says: "If you break me, you get one year of bad luck."
The mirror scoffs: "Oh, that's nothing. You break me and you get 7 years of bad luck."
The condom overhears these arguments and walks off laughing.
What did Warner Brothers get for making that horrible Joker sequel?
They got what they fucking deserved!!!!!!!!
My life.
Tell me when you get it.
Why did the slave go to college?
To get his master's degree.
What do you get when you add 5 + 2 + 3 + 2 + 200 + 10?
Completely confuse you!
How it feels to get so mad at the game. That you can't even explain your anger So you just low key Slime yourself out.
What's the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
Why doesn’t my bully get a dad joke? Oh, ya, ummm...
Michael J. Fox goes in to get a haircut. He comes out missing an ear.
A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."
What did Osama get on his test when he was a kid? A 9/11.
Roses are red.
My soul is black.
I am never getting my dad back.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime?
I think they just hacked the "chrime."
"Honey, let's not go so deep into the woods, please. I'm starting to get scared."
"It's easy for you to talk. I can go back alone right now!"
A man is on his death sentence, and he gets to choose his last meal.
He asks his guard for a McDonald's Ice Cream, and lives a very long life. They never found a working machine.
What do you get when you mix an apple with water... applesauce. Wait, do not leave yet. If you are still reading this, you have been rekt, ha ha. At least I am still laughing.
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: .....it...
Friend: No
Me: *smiles* GETS BEAT BY THE MISTRESS AND GETS SCOLDED BY THE MASTER!!!
Friend: Why are you like this?
What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile?
"Get in the Batmobile!"
Buh dum tish.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
A brunette fought and didn't get raped.
A blonde thought and did get raped.
How did the orphan lose its parents?
Its parents never came back from getting milk.