Get jokes
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?
It didn't want to get stuck in any more cracks!
What do you get when you get yourself a deer with no eyes?
You get no-eye-deer.
Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"
He waited for three hours to get an answer.
His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."
This one kid I knew had Down syndrome, and he turned a mirror upside down trying to get rid of it.
How did the burglar get into my house?
Intruder window.
I called the suicide hotline, and he suggested I draw on myself to distract myself.
I replied I'd get ink poisoning.
Wouldn't recommend, the police came.
Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.
Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.
Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.
Jesus and his friend went fishing. They both cast their lines out, and both of them get a bite, but Jesus's friend misses and says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus said, "That's a bad sentence to say; if you say it 3 times, something bad will happen to you." They cast it out again, and both get a bite, and Jesus's friend misses again and says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus replied, "If you say that one more time, something bad will happen." They cast out again, and Jesus's friend's line snaps, and he says, "Damn, I missed." Jesus said, "That's the last time something bad will happen." The biggest thunderstorm ever seen appeared, and a lightning bolt struck Jesus, and a voice came from the clouds, "Damn, I missed."
A woman's age is harder to get than the President's phone number.
Why are orphans bad at baseball? They can't get home.
Why do Priests like playing the violin? They get to finger A minor.
How do you get a hippie chick pregnant?
You cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
Time to go to New York to visit the Twin Towers.
They’re already getting closer.
What did the bison say to his son leaving for school?
"Bye son!"
Get it? Bye son, Bison!
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
This mute kid was getting made fun of. I told him to speak up for himself.
What did the little girl with no arms get for Christmas?
I don't know, she's still trying to open it...
Yo mama is so fat she can't even get in her own car because she's fat.
What do you get when you cross a German and a Mexican? A “BeanerSchnitzel”!
What does a kid with cancer and dark humor have in common? They never get old.