Game jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home base to run to.
2001, Angry Birds was so amazing. Over 500 people in 2 birds.
Have you played the game Imagine Dragons? Imagine draggin' deez nuts!
How do you win a game of musical chairs? You steal the chair!
Badminton: Your breath is so bad that you have to take a mint before you go on Fortnite.
Did you know that in 2001 there was an Among Us game, except that it was on a plane and had two imposters.
Why can't Chinese people play baseball? They always eat the bat.
My friend asked, "What's that on your arm?" I replied, "Oh, this? I didn't have enough storage on my phone to download Fruit Ninja so I had to improvise a little bit."
Nice! Angry Birds really has improved.
What's Pokémon #539 (Sawk)?
Sawk on deez nuts!
What is the only video game to be ever made in Africa?
Where's My Water?
There's a new game in the arcade where kids can hit raging paedophiles with a mallet: Whack-A-Jack, oh!
Why do orphans love playing baseball?
They can always run home.
True fact: Five out of six people think Russian roulette is safe.
(Russian roulette is a game where you put 1 bullet in a pistol that has 6 chambers; each person spins it and tries not to land on the bullet to find out if you got the bullet or not. You point the gun at yourself and pull the trigger.)
I kick a soccer ball at someone in a wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.
What is a necrophile's least favorite game?
The Walking Dead.
Why can't America play chess?
There are missing two towers.
A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi were chatting one day when the conversation turned to a discussion of job descriptions and promotion.
"What do you have to look forward to in way of a promotion in your job?" asked the Rabbi.
"Well, I'm next in line for the Monsignor's job," replied the Priest.
"Yes, and then what?" asked the Rabbi.
"Well, next I can become Bishop," said the Priest.
"Yes, and then?" asked the Rabbi.
"If I work real hard and do a good job as Bishop, it's possible for me to become an Archbishop," said the Priest.
"O.K., then what?" asked the Rabbi.
The Priest, beginning to get a bit exasperated, replied, "With some luck and real hard work, maybe I can become a Cardinal."
"And then?" asked the Rabbi.
The Priest is really starting to get mad now and replies, "With lots and lots of luck and some real difficult work and if I'm in the right places at the right times and play my political games just right, maybe, just maybe, I can get elected Pope."
"Yes, and then what?" asked the Rabbi.
"Good grief!" shouted the Priest. "What do you expect me to become, GOD?"
"Well," said the Rabbi, "One of our boys made it!"
Why did hockey wookie slap kissing Missy in the face? Because Huggy didn't get a kissy from Kissy Missy.
Why do orphans suck at GTA? Because they don't know how to be wanted.