Funeral

Funeral Jokes

Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding she’d say: “you’re next”. So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.

I have double standards: burn a body at a crematorium and you're being a respectful friend; do it at home and you're destroying evidence.

Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!

All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.

My dad said wheres pickles the family cat i said im sorry to say hes in the sky, oh i see he passed away no i strapped him to 20 fireworks

So my friend died. I was at her casket. I said I'll see you on the other side, so I went to the other side of the casket.

My relatives always teased me during weddings, saying, "You'll be next!"

But they stopped when I did the same to them during funerals.

You're at a funeral. Your mum says be quiet, so you snigger at the body and say, "Bye forever, bitch."