Friend jokes

I would have a joke for my friend... but he can't afford the punchline.

I'm surprised that the tree is still standing when my emo friend is hanging from it.

I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...

I used to be emo.

I don't have a joke, I just have a friend named Jack.

Me: Why can't orphans play baseball? Friend: Why? Me: Because they can't find home.

The dark side of kid songs:

You got a friend in me... you got a friend in me!

A Chinese guy said to his friend: "I saw you fucking your donkey yesterday."

His friend: "No, that's impossible, it's too hot inside."

Hi Eric Le!

Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.

Too bad only one was standing. :)

Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?

Friend: What?

Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.

What did the pickle say to his friend Rick?

"We are Pickle Ricks!"

Where's my sister's friend? Oh, I forgot, we are in Alabama.

Why do emos have friends?

So they can hang with each other.

My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden.

He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, "You have to dig a little."

What's the one upside to being an orphan?

You never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.

Me and my friends are going to create a Steps tribute band. We are all in wheelchairs, so we are going to be called "Ramps."

When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"

How does the skeleton call his friends? With a tele-bone.

My friend is gonna release an air strike. There has to be at least 20 confirmed toilet kills.

Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.