Food jokes
"Mixed vegetables is just special ed class, change my mind."
Why did the nut go to the bank?
To cashew its check.
"Mayotte’s are sinking in the yogurt! (My Oat’s)" 🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹🇾🇹
Why do orphans love McDonald's?
Because the initials are like "mother" and "father."
What’s a green cucumber?
A carrot.
Do nut get in my way.
Umm, Tyrone did not get his chicken.
Hello, This is Jimmy from Jimmy's Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic! Your next loss is our next sauce! How many pizzas do you need?
What flavor do you buy an orphan?
Self raising.
What do emo kids and apples have in common?
They both hang off trees.
What is a fish's favorite fruit/vegetable?
An avacodo.
What's the difference between a square peg in a round hole and a kilo of lard?
One's a good lot of fat; the other's a fat lot of good.
What did the blender say to the orange juice?
"What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid, shut the fuck up."
If you are a banana, why don't you eat a banana?
Oh right, you'd be a cannibal. I mean a banan-i-ball.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
I went to a truck on wheels, they said, "Wheel feed you."
"Ketchup with me, you are too slow."
What do you call a bruised banana?
A school bus full of his kids.
What's the difference between eggs and you? Eggs get laid, you don't.
What's the definition of disgusting?
Sticking 5 oysters up your grandmother and sucking 6 out!