Food jokes
What do you call a red potato?
A tomato. 🍅
(I know it's cringe!)
A man had moved to a new country with his dog and with basic understanding of the language. One day he heard people talking about a place for dogs, so he took his dog there, telling them he wanted his dog to be groomed.
The man behind the counter responded with "yes happy dog, come back in little hours." So the man left and came back a couple hours later. When he asked about his dog, he was given a box of jerky. He found out "Happy Dog" was the name of the place where dogs become food.
Me: Do you eat your cereal with water? You: No, why? Me: 'Cause your dad never came back with the milk!
What do you call a different spaghetti? An impasta!
PAPYRUS: WHAT DO YOU CALL A DIFFERENT SPAGHETTI SANS?
SANS: What?
PAPYRUS: AN IMPASTA!
SANS: Good one.
A chicken is delicious.
I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.
All I said was, "Hurry up, some of us got homes to go to..."
Why wouldn’t Mrs. Grapes leave her children behind?
Because she loves raisin kids.
Have you ever heard of emo pizza?
It cuts itself!
What did the tomato say to the tomato ketchup?
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.
What did the cucumber say to the bell pepper that wasn't wearing enough clothes?
You need more dressing.
Question: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Answer: Because they taste funny!
Yo mama so fat, she thought "RAW MEN" was "RAMEN."
Yo mama so fat, she likes long, romantic walks to the refrigerator.
Why did the Roman eat pizza? He felt like it.
I heard a joke about chocolate.
It wasn’t that funny.
I just Snicker-ed.
What country do French Fries come from? Grease.
We should stop taking the piss out of Asian people. I mean, they already have enough on their plates... like cats and dogs.
Why don’t you peel a banana?
It’s too hard to kill your nana.
Why doesn't a teddy bear eat? Because it is already stuffed.