Food jokes
"Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I'm not going to spread it!"
Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.
What stresses a baby strawberry out?
When its mom is in a jam.
They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Well, not if it's poisoned. Then the antidote becomes the most important.
What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?
The pizza guy shows up when you call him.
Memes
What two fights can Africa never win?
A food fight and a water fight.
What are emo kids' least favorite lollies?
Life Savers.
What does cake and baseball have in common?
They both need a batter.
How do you disappoint people in Africa?
Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.
But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.
What’s the difference between God and Hitler?
God made thousands of bread, Hitler made thousands of toast.
How do you know if a rapper is hungry?
They start dropping BEATS at the dinner table.
Why did the rapper get kicked out of the kitchen?
Because he kept dropping the BEETS!
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because he wanted to ROLL in the DOUGH!
Yo mama's so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl!
I'm always willing to go down on a special needs girl.
Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.
This dude is so fat, wearing the same damn clothes every day. Every time he turns around, it's his graduation day. He forgot to put a boomerang on his pants because they don't even fit anymore. Last time I saw him coming down the street, it was in a bucket of Popeye's chicken, extra crispy.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
Why is 7 afraid of 6?
Because 7 is a vegetarian and 6 is a cannibal.
Why are Indians dark?
Because they are born and bred in chicken curry.
What is the best time to eat dinner?
When you're hungry.