Food jokes
Why were Twin Towers mad that their food wasn’t good enough?
Because they got plain.
Sandwiches are yummy! 😋
What egg do you buy an orphan?
Free range.
What do orphans and people eating oranges have in common? They both are eating balls.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
when your mom finds out you pour milk before cereal
Who discovered shrimp were edible?
Probably the same one who invented the blowjob.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the British bastard and get the egg roll.
You are so fat you tried to eat the word "edible."
What does a refrigerator and a gay male have in common?
Only one farts when you pull the meat out. 🌝🌝🌝
What happens when a cow masturbates?
Beef jerky.
I have a taste for some roast duck until the feathers will pop right out and say, "Quack, quack."
What's the difference between a girl eating Taco Bell and doing sex a few times? Nothing. Something always comes out.
Do you put a baby in the microwave covered or uncovered?
Covered, it can take weeks to clean up the explosion.
This morning, I was in the kitchen, and I saw a whole bunch of leftover brownies made from scratch. I just tasted one and spit it out because somebody put some goddamn weed in them, what the fuck!
A B C D E F G.
Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!
Why was 911 annoyed at the pizza guy?
Because they ordered meat lovers, but they got plane.
What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?
A meringue-atang.
When do eggs hatch?
At the CRACK of dawn!
Q. What movie is a fat person most afraid of?
A. The Hunger Games.