If you think the guy calling you fat is offensive,
Try salad 🥗.
Food Jokes
Q: What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?
A: The abortion clinic doesn't deliver.
Who is buried in the tomb of Alexander the Grape?
Alexander the raisin.
What happens when you put a baby in a blender?
The baby is a cherry smoothie.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
If you are what you eat, then I’m black.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple always gets picked.
What's the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer; the other's just a watermelon. 😁😁
What’s long and black?
The line at KFC.
Ayo, the pizza here... OH NlGGA! AHHHHH!... Augh, my ears burn!
I cried when my dad cut onions.
Onions was a good dog.
What do suicidal people and apples have in common?
They both hang from trees.
1. What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho cheese.
2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ash. Ash who? Achoo!
3. How does the ocean say hello? He waves.
4. Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she will let it go.
5. What do you call your enemy? You don't call it at all.
What did the spaghetti say to the sauce? Pasta la vista!
My ill sis said, "Why did the bear say no to ice cream?" and I said, "Why?" She said, "'Cuz it's stuffed!"
What do you get when you gobble down sweets?
What two things can you never have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner!
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
What did the bird do when he ate the expired worm?
He flew up!
