Food jokes
What's an egg's favorite phrase?
An eggspression.
Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant, I asked the waiter, "People under 12 eat free, right?" The waiter confirmed that yes, people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "But I'm 13."
what do you call a baby in an oven?
my next meal.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked.
What's the traditional food of Black Jews? - Kosher watermelon...
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
The apples get picked.
What is a good night's sleep, and what do I have for dinner today is what [I want to know].
What do suicidal people and apples have in common?
They both hang from trees.
What does a squirrel eat? Deez Nutz in their mouth.
Slapped cheese on my white friend, told him I like cheese on my crackers.
How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
What's the same thing between milk and a kid with cancer?
They both have an expiry date.
It puts a whole new spin on meals on wheels. No pun intended.
Yo mama so stupid, when she was in court and the judge said, "Order, order," she said, "Pizza."
One time my friend nutted into my bag of trail mix.
I guess you could say I fucking ate a different kind of nut.
What kind of flour do orphans use to make bread?
Self-raising.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
I would tell you a joke about pizza,
but it's too cheesy.
What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?
An Oreo.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.