Food jokes
Michael Jackson is pure cheese.
I mean, Jacko comes on a little cracker.
What’s the difference between a pig and Maddie McCann?
Least a pig had an apple in its mouth when it was spit roasted.
Why can't Asians play baseball?
Because they ate all the bats!
Which Roman emperor was a mouse?
Julius Cheeser.
Now it's time to make fun of Asians.
What do you call an Asian eating jelly? Yellow Jell-O.
Do you guys know what KFC stands for? It stands for kidnapping foster children.
My mom and dad: KIDS COME DOWNSTAIRS TO EAT! Me: What's for dinner? Mom and Dad: Food.
The next day KIDS COME DOWNSTAIRS FOR FOOD! My brother and sister: What's for dinner? Me: Food ;-;
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better, so I sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wife's broken leg.
We must start a propaganda for baked beans.
I can't believe this!
Pizza is round and it comes in a square box, and you cut it into a triangle.
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
Why didn’t the grape 🍇 leave her family?
Because she loved raisin' kids!
You know what's the difference between my basement and Chick-fil-A?
A lot of things.
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat!
Your mum is so fat that she took a spoon to the supercool.
How did the cookie 🍪 feel when he was dunked in milk?
Batter.
Your dad died of hunger on the journey to find the milk.
What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.
Why can't orphans have a large bag of chips? Because they're family sized.