Bosses are like seagulls. They fly in, make a lot of noise, crap all over everything, then fly out.

What do you call a black man flying a plane?

A pilot you racist bastard.

What do you call a flying sheep?

A muttonbird

1950: In the future there will be flying cars

2018: Pewdiepie shuts down Shane Dawson

I once did an exam on rainbows. I passed with flying colours.

What has 10 wheels & flies? A Garbage truck.

I told my friend to fly a plane,

But he threw a ramp of a roof

What does a bar fly and a Necrophiliac have in common?

They both enjoy a Cold one once in awhile.

God creates a mosquito :) God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly. Angel: okay… a bug. God: now give it’s face a sword, but it has a hole so it’s basically a mouth. Angel: weird… but okay… God: and give it wings. Angel: eh, not half bad Go- God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS Angel: shook o-okay God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out. Angel: .-. God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give ‘em a taste ‘o that! evil grin Angel: cries Angel: whispers; I’m so sorry…

There once was 3 men on an airplane and one bit into an apple and said this is disgusting and threw it out the window the 2nd man bit into a banana and said this is rotten and he threw it out the window the 3rd man bit into a bomb and screamed " ALL MY TEETH FELL OUT" and he threw it out the window. Meanwhile, on the ground, a police officer was walking and he saw a kid crying and he went up to him and asked him why he was crying he replied an apple came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head! the police officer said that is weird and kept on walking. Then he saw another kid crying and the police officer asked why are you crying and he answered a banana came flying out of the sky and hit he on the head the officer said this has been a strange day. Then he says a kid laughing and he asked why he was laughing and he said while he was laughing my dad farted and the house blew up.

why did Sally decide to fly to school?

She couldn’t drive.

According to all known laws of aviation,

there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let’s shake it up a little.

  • That girl was hot.
  • She’s my cousin!

If seagulls fly over the sea what flies over the bay


What does a kid with cancer and a house fly have in common?

A life expectancy of 15-25 days.

I can tell you a airplane joke, but it will probably fly over your head

What is the difference between a human and a magic car 🚗? A magic car can fly and a house 🏡 can not fly

yo’ mamas so stinky that whenever she walks into a building, the flies drop dead!

What do you call a airplane that doesn’t fly, wingless

I love you 😘

Why did jimmy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see time fly.