What do you call a airplane that doesn’t fly, wingless
A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs.
"For the last time, Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!"
The man with glasses frowns.
"Where did all the others go, then?"
1950: In the future there will be flying cars
2018: Pewdiepie shuts down Shane Dawson
What do call a flying bus? An Airbus.
Rainbows top the class, as they always score with flying colors.
What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird!
What has 4 wheels and can fly? A garbage truck.
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they would bexpect bagels.
Aren't paraplegics just plegics that can fly?
Yo mama so tall!!! When she wakes up from her bed, she stands up and finds NASA beside her face, and she thinks it's a fly!!!
What did the corn say to the flying apple?
"That's corny."
What do you call a squirrel that flies? A flying squirrel.
What is yellow and can’t fly? A school bus
What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?
A Jedi Flight.
What do you call a squirrel with wings? A flying squirrel, it's pretty self-explanatory.
If you spin a fidget spinner, You'll end up spinning it too fast. When you end up spinning it too fast, it will make you fly away. When you fly away, you'll end up in a tree. When you end up in a tree, you'll see that your friends are hanging out without you. When you see that your friends are hanging out without you, you'll run away in the woods because you're sad. When you ran away in the woods, you'll see a bear. When you see a bear, it will chase you. When the bear chases you, you'll build a fort to protect yourself. When you build a fort to protect yourself, you then notice you're lonely. You'll become friends with the bear. When you become friends with a bear, you'll start to act like a bear. When you start to act like a bear, you will become a bear.
DO NOT BECOME A BEAR! NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER!
God creates a wasp :) God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly. Angel: okay... a bug. God: now give it’s face a sword, but it has a hole so it’s basically a mouth. Angel: weird.. but okay... God: and give it wings. Angel: eh, not half bad Go- God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS Angel: *shook* o-okay God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out. Angel: .-. God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give ‘em a taste ‘o that! *evil grin* Angel: *cries* Angel: *whispers; I’m so sorry..*
An Irishman, Englishman, and Scotsman go into a pub and each order a pint of Guinness.
Just as the bartender hands them over, three flies buzz down and one lands in each of the pints.
The Englishman looks disgusted, pushes his pint away, and demands another pint.
The Scotsman picks out the fly, shrugs, and takes a long swallow.
The Irishman reaches into the glass, pinches the fly between his fingers, and shakes him while yelling, "Spit it out, ya bastard! Spit it out!"
I heard some twin brothers were going as buildings to the school costume contest, so I went as a plane. It didn't fly too well with people.
What has three balls and flies through space?
E.T. the extra testicle.
