Finance jokes
I tried to adopt an orphan. The card got declined harder than the child did.
Why do goalkeepers have so much money in the bank?
Because they are really good at saving.
What do you call a rich Chinese man?
Cha-ching!
What do you call a Chinese rich man? Cha-ching!
My credit card is more declined than the love from my dad.
What is the difference between paying $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole and paying $175.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from an able-bodied bisexual white female who is also a sex worker at a glory hole?
If you give $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole you are saving yourself $125.00. 💸😁
I was working at the bank today when an old lady came up to me and asked me to check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
Would love to pound Sterling with a 14 lb hammer.
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!
What do you call a rich Chinese person?!? Kaching!
It only takes 4 inches to please a woman.
And it doesn’t matter if it’s credit or debit.
Q: What do you call a Chinese billionaire?
A: Cha-Ching!
Husband: “Honey, what’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection?”
Wife: “ok... what is it?”
Husband: “I don’t have a Ferrari right now.”
My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.
A guy bought an AMG and crashed it. Now he knows how the Mercedes bends.
Do you want drugs? Buy KFC; poor people.
When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark.
But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!
Yo, Bloon... what bitch where the fuck my child support camo Bloon? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form consists of only four lines:
1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.