Fear jokes
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. It's not dead, just afraid to move.
Why are lamps so scared? Because someone might throw them away.
"Honey, let's not go so deep into the woods, please. I'm starting to get scared."
"It's easy for you to talk. I can go back alone right now!"
Why are orphans so scared of the dark?
The dad can't check the closet for them.
What do you call a calf that is in no way brave?
A coward.
As the strongest curse, Jogot fought the frog, the king of curses. He began to open his domain. Sukuna shrunk back in fear.
Why are New Yorkers scared of airplanes?
I threw my boomerang and now I live in constant fear.
A little girl said one day, "Grandma's gonna die tonight!" The next morning, the girl's grandmother's body was found.
That day she said again, "Grandpa's gonna die tonight!" Sure enough, the girl's grandfather died and his body was discovered the next morning.
That day she said, "Daddy's gonna die tonight." The girl's father was terrified. He lay shaking the entire night. Somehow, he survived until morning. His wife came into the room crying. He asked her why she was upset and she said that the postman had died last night.
I do not understand why people aren't scared of spiders. I mean, like they have 87447924872320984623879480327678987388025873289576348097923408370983728 legs and 23864867759578590893839420387424763478923748394783294327428748243264278 eyes.
I saw a spider in my room. YOU THINK I'M GONNA SLEEP IN THERE?????????
Nope. I'm moving to Japan.
KONNICHIWA
I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you!"
Why wasn’t the duck afraid to cross the road? Because he wasn’t chicken!
How can you tell a bow n' arrows scared?
He starts to quiver! ;)
You are so scary that even your hairline ran away.
Me: I will rape you!
Woman: NOOOOOO!!! I AM TOO SCARED TO GET "RAPED"!
Why do women be like this?
You're so ugly you scared the crap out of the toilet!
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn't chicken!
Why was Balls afraid of Magic?
Because Magic eight Balls.
Why is 6 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like all the passengers on the plane he was flying.
What is the best type of snake? A dead one.