Fear

Fear jokes

What’s the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus?

They’re both saying “Oh my god my mom’s gonna kill me!”

What's the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus? They're both saying "Oh my god, my mom's gonna kill me!"

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  • I'm not going to bungee jump. I was born because of broken rubber and I'm not gonna die the same way.

    Are guys scared of the word "Choppiness"?

    Because it is literally saying "chop-penis."

    A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun.

    The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: "Shut up... you're next!"

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  • I have fun going on them roller coasters that go really high up and sitting by random people, and once we get to the high point, I look at the stranger and go "wham" and unplug their seat belt.

    Mrs. Duncan knows where you live. She lives there too. In your basement... lolololololololololololololololololol

    Chuck Norris sleeps with the light on, not because he is afraid of the darkness, but because the darkness is afraid of him.

    So, a guy is walking with a young boy into the woods.

    Boy: "Hey mister, it's getting dark out and I'm scared!"

    Man: "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone!"

    Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It's not dead or anything, it's just too scared to move.

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