Favorite Jokes

What is an orphan's favorite store? Home Depot.

What’s a gay person’s favorite book?

The dictionary.

What is a gay man's favorite hobby?

Cockfighting.

What is a rat's favorite dessert?

A chocolate mousse cake.

What's a snake's favorite subject?

Well, there are two: hisss-tory, but some prefer maths; those weirdos are adders.

Me when I break my pony :

The image shows five cartoon characters. Pierce is on the left, with blue hair and a sad expression. Next to him is Ein, also with blue hair, looking shocked. Aaron, with dark hair, holds a broken pink pony. Next is Zane, who wears a black mask. Finally, Aphmau, with purple hair, looks concerned. Text at the bottom asks: "Who broke Zane's favorite pony?"

Q: What is Hitler's least favorite grocery store?

A: Jew-Osco

What's a delinquent mitten's favorite sport?

Badminton.

What is Jack Frost's favorite mode of transport?

A Tri-cycle.

Q. What's Jeffery Dahmer's favorite song?

A. "Pieces of You."

What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?

A Ba-na-na-na! (To the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)

There was a man who had just moved from a foreign country. He just moved into his apartment and was watching his favorite TV shows. The first one was "me-me-me, me-me-me, me-me-me-me-me-me-me," the second one was "forks and knives, forks and knives, all I use is forks and knives," and the last one was "BRING IT ON, FAT MAN!!"

There had been a murder in the area, and the man was walking in the park when a cop showed up and asked him, "Sir, have you seen this man?" and held up a photo. The man said "me-me-me, me-me-me, me-me-me-me-me-me-me." The cop said, "Sir, what did you use?" and the man said "forks and knives, forks and knives, all I use is forks and knives." After that, the cop said, "Sir, I'm going to have to arrest you," and the man said "BRING IT ON, FAT MAN!!" The screen goes black, and all you can here "chk-chk. BANG"

This gay guy was so happy with his new boyfriend that he took him to his favorite gay bar.

An hour or so goes by, then the new flame says, "I just LOVE this place, everyone is so nice, food is great, but what's up with the monkey way down there?"

His friend says "OK, watch this." He goes up behind the chimp and smacked him in back of its head. The monkey jumped off the stool, pulls down his zipper, and gives him head. When finished, the chimp took a napkin, cleaned himself, pulled up his zipper, then jumped back to his chair.

He walked back to his new gay friend and said, "What do you think of that?"

"MAN, I seen some amazing things, but never like that!" His squeeze said, "Wanna give it a try?"

"I sure do, JUST DON'T hit me as hard as you hit that monkey."