Family jokes
Why don't orphans learn about ancient Egypt? They don't know what mummies are.
I don't got free candy. It costs child support.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in the year?
Because they don’t have a Mother's nor Father’s Day.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?
Milk, because no one came back with any.
How do orphans have names because they don't have anyone to give them names?
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
I wasn't close to my dad when he died.
Which was good. He died during 9/11.
Yo mom's so fat, I went over to her house a few years ago and wanted to watch TV.
So I asked for the TV remote, and she's still trying to get it!
I started crying when Dad was chopping onions.
Onions was a good dog.
What's the best competition to do with an orphan?
Which orphan had their parent for the longest?
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they do not know where home is.
Why can you hit an orphan?
They can't tell their parents.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
Why can’t an orphan play GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
Why do orphans hate plane rides?
Because there’s no home to come back to.
Just ask your dad.
My mom loves balls.
But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.
What were the balloon's last words to his Father?
"Watch me, Pop!"
What do orphans get for Christmas?
Lonely.
Why didn't the orphan play video games with his friends?
Because his parents wouldn't let him.