Family

Family jokes

Dad

Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.

Next day:

Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?

Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.

The dad sulked for 3 whole years.

Proof that words really can hurt.

Memes

Dad

My friend asked me why I haven’t had milk in six years.

I told him my dad never came back with it.

Love

1273. My mother does not love me, nor does anyone, and my family doesn't either.

Dad

What’s the difference between a dad and a boomerang? The boomerang comes back.

Orphan

The one good thing about an orphan is that they don't get roasted with a "yo mama" joke.

Mom

My mom said, "Hey, come over here."

I responded, "Too late, Mom!"

Orphan

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples are picked.