Family jokes
I made a website for orphans.
Unfortunately, it does not have a home page.
I held on to my money stronger than an orphan holds on to a teddy bear on Father's Day.
Why can you not let an orphan touch an iPhone 7? Because it would break if they touched the home button.
Hi Freshfry, hi Alex, I did not see your messages yesterday because I was at my brother's soccer game, and then people came to our house till 11:00. Lol, sorry :)
I've heard stories of my mother. She was a teenager and left me in the blender, but luckily the power cut out, like at the orphanage.
My sister is really disrespectful, and her famous words are, "You're not my parent!" The next time she says this, I'm going to respond back with, "You're right, because I would have worn a condom to protect from you being born unlike my dad did!"
Why do orphans have no home?
Because they didn't have a family to give them one.
Why do orphans prefer the monarchy?
Because they could feel the warm[th] of the royal family.
Dad: Where is my son?
Son: Come join me with musical chairs, except we stand on them.
Dad: Ok, so do we put this round our neck?
Son: YES!
Mum: AHHHHHHHHHHHH
One day a mom who looked like a pig broke the car down.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because it doesn't know where home base is.
Mom! (DYM 3)
I went up to an orphan and asked where their parents were--they stared.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Mom!
Why do orphans like the game Adopt Me? Because they've never been adopted in their life.
What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourself!
Teacher: I was an orphan when I was younger.
Student: Oof.
Teacher: Is anyone not here?
Student: Yes, your parents.
I’ll always remember my father’s last words: “I’m gonna sleep for a little.”
I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather.
Good thing is, since he hit his head, he can't remember either.