Everyone

Everyone jokes

Boyfriend

    • EVERYONE:

    "My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"

    Suicide

    • Suicide is just freedom, life is just full of pain... Sometimes if you're gone maybe somebody might notice. Feels like life is a maze and the only way to leave is the exit. Nobody notices your pain, your suffering, and that you try your best though everyone notices your mistakes. Life just feels like everyone hates you. Life for me is just faking smiles, I'm not sure how everyone lives such a good life.

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    • Birthday

    • Everyone when we're in the cafeteria singing happy birthday to some random person: "Happy birthday to you..., Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear

    Me in the background: Happy deathday to you..., Happy deathday to you, happy death day dear___, happy death day to you!"

    Bullying

    • A noose, a knife, a gun, and a razor blade look at a child who committed suicide after being bullied.

    Everyone looked at the noose. The noose would say, "What? It wasn't my fault!"

    Everyone memes

    Halloween

    • Hey guys, I have a question.

    Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?

    Sky

    • Myrtle Beach has a clear blue sky and sunny weather, a pleasant place to visit as a family. Don't you think they are not evil creatures, and do you think they have them?

    "No, there are no ghosts or evil creatures." You can say that, but don't be surprised when Gina Claw Scare comes for you, aka GCS for short. Gina Claw Scare was born in North Carolina in August 1991. She died in 2000. No, that's not real. WRONG. Gina's real name was Gina Clawien Scaren. Yes, that's why her name is Gina Claw Scare. Why did she die? I know, right? She died from a curse from her bad companions. We never knew their names. The curse sent her down a dark path, demons and hate comments from people on Instagram, Facebook, and the worst jokes on the site.

    Gina Claw Scare loved fire, which means she was a pyromaniac. She would rise from the grave in which she was buried. Did what? Stop, for real this time!

    They buried her on a lawn in the forest that caught fire. "HARSH MAN!" I know, right? She rises from that grave, she comes for the people who call her by name four times. Then she beat the drums and set your house on fire! A fire so harmful that you can feel hurt, friends. You can hear everyone's screaming, and then become like her. Never say her name. NEVER.

    Absence

    • Hey, I haven't been on for like 2 months. I don't know who is still on here or like if everyone left, but yuh, I just decided to come back. Hey.

    Love

    • There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.

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    • Liver

    • Why did everyone dislike Little Johnny at school?

    'Cause he pierced everyone's livers with a .357 magnum.

    Brother

    • Ok, everyone on this website... I HAVE NO BROTHERS OR SISTERS. The person who claims he's my "brother" is firesharky. He is trying to get fame. Never listen to him. He will lie and trick you to think I have a brother, but I don't.

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    • Snack Bar

    • Why did everyone run from the Mexican when he went to the snack bar?

    He said "¡Hola snack bar!" ¡Hola means hello in Spanish.

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    • Saxophone

    • I play saxophone, and I like to tell everyone I am a registered s/o (short for saxophone operator) in hopes of one day starting a jazz band, but now everyone looks at me weird, and when I go to house parties to perform, everyone hides their children, but little do they know I LOVE children. For some reason, I got multiple restraining orders because I said, “I want to touch the kids so they can one day become musicians themselves... like Michael Jackson.” I have then since moved from my hometown to Florida, where I can meet up with other s/o’s, and surprisingly, they have similar stories to me, but they say they have never even touched a saxophone, but they do like touching kids, which I’m all down for, just me and my buddies showing the new youth their abilities.

    Update: i figured out what they meant by s/o is not the same as my s/o :(

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    • Orphan

    • Me to an orphan: If you had a penny for everyone who loved you, I don't think you'd have any.

    The orphan: But why?

    Me: Because if someone loved you, they wouldn't have thrown you out.

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