Everyone jokes
You know, that I see my sister at home from school. She says everyone bullies me. I say, "Because you're a fat a**."
I don't know why everyone cares so much about 3D printers. I've had a Canon printer for years.
Attention to everyone, I'm not going to be on for 2 weeks because I was in a bike accident, or more like a motorcycle accident. I was ran off the road when my 16 year old brother was taking me for a ride. Now I can't use my legs cause, well, you know. I will be taking a break because I don't want to move my legs that much.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like everyone else in the plane.
I was staying over at my friend's; for the purpose of the joke, he shall be called Kian. It was 03:00 am and everyone else was asleep when I heard a soft banging on the wall. I left the room to inspect it. Kian lived with his grandad John Hauge; it was thought he had a huge slong.
The banging was getting louder, and so too was my heartbeat. I opened John's door and ventured into the room. John was fully naked. There was a glory hole through the wall where I could make it Kian's ass. This is what I have been waiting for. I rip off my shorts, which Ali G bought for me, and silently moved towards John. I shoved [my] 1-inch wonder in his ear. John furiously turned around and slapped me with his cock, "You little gimp, get on the bed."
Kian came in the room with a 2-litre bottle of Irn Bru. He demanded, "What the fudge are you doing?"
I replied smoothly, "Kian, you tracksuit warrior, you have a camel toe!"
Kian fires back, "Shut it, Paul, you have genital warts!"
John screams, "SHUT THE FUCK UP!"
He then gives us it so rough I can't walk the next day, but [I] feel pleasured for eternity.
By Lewis
A UN survey asked the following: Please, in your honest opinion, could you give your thoughts on the food shortages in the rest of the world?
It was a failure because:
South Americans don’t know the word “please.”
Eastern Europeans don’t know the word “honest.”
Middle Easterns don’t know the word “opinion.”
Balkans don’t know the word “give.”
Chinese don’t know the word “thoughts.”
Africans don’t know the word “food.”
Western Europeans don’t know the word “shortage.”
Americans don’t know the words “the rest of the world.”
Then they simply explained “just donate healthy food to the global south to help.” But that still didn’t sit right with everyone, because Israelis do not know the word “donate,” and Pacific Islanders do not know the words “healthy food.”
Attention to everyone - I will be leaving for 3 weeks for a summer break. I will be back in 3 weeks. When I come back, I want someone to tell me everything that has happened over these weeks. (Gwen or Addison Banks).
Sincerely, watersharky.
Why did everyone quit the high school volleyball team? To join Coach Kyle's team, of course!
EVERYONE:
"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"
I just want to say good morning to Gwen and everyone on this site. Have a nice day.
What if it's okay if someone can see my blue jokes, hello, bully, love, crazy, and Ariana jokes? Thanks!
Women, you're a marshmallow because you're white, squashy, and everyone sticks their stick inside you.
Know why they call gonorrhea gonorrhea?
'Cause once you have it, everyone is gone.
Everyone, Alya is okay!!!!!!!!!! She got up, she can walk, and she can talk regular!!!!
"Tj and Prince, I really think we should stop doing this date night, date fight thing on this website because it's driving everyone crazy, and this is a joke website, not a dating website, so I say let's just take this to Facebook."
I went to school and everyone was screaming and looking at me. They weren't after I shot them, though.
Why did the mailman die?
'Cause everyone dies.
SMG4 Mario be like in Ohio: I don’t wanna do this...
Candice everyone: Candice?
Mario: CAN DEEZ NUTS FIT IN YOUR MOUTH!
Why do they call Melania Trump the "Walk-In Freezer"?
Answer: Because it's where EVERYONE GOES to "Hang Their Meat!"
Why did the adopted kid eat the last cookie? Because he was the only one left to adopt; everyone hated him.
Why do trannies have such high rates of suicide?
Because they want everyone to accept them, but they can't accept themselves.