Everybody

Everybody Jokes

Attention everyone: I will be leaving this website. Thank you everybody who has been nice to me. Maybe I’ll come back in the future but for now: Goodbye.

Teacher on school bus everybody sit down now the bus is about to start Ben: I’m not going to sit down I don’t want to, Teacher: you have to or else u have to get off the bus, Teacher: “stands up” Ben: then u should get off the bus cause ur not sitting.

What is the diffrence between a bag of chips and a gun...

If you pull one of them suddenly everybody wants to be your friend

Everyone “look it’s super man” me “no it’s an emo” everybody “oh”.

One time a crow saw a peacock and then wanted to be like a peacock so picked up peacock feathers and then wear them then he starts walking and everybody thinks he's strange and then his friends are not his friends anymore and then after that he says friends please be my friends again I'm sorry I will be the way I am

Once upon a time a donkey was in the jungle suddenly he found a lion costume and then wore it then he walks around the forest and then every animal was scared of him then he got to city every human was away from him and he was chasing them when he was chasing his owner he brayed and then he figured out that this is not an real lion and then he told everybody about it then he berated up his donkey

One time an and was collecting food suddenly a wind and pushed the ant to the river the ant said help help and a pigeon heared it then he grab a leaf and throwed It in a river the ant climbed on it and then pigeon and the ant became best friends but one time a hunter came to kill the pigeon when the saw him she bites his leg and the pigeon flys away from the arrow and that's how friends are everybody

Why did Orphans have to drink there own piss? Because last time they went to the bar they went with there dad and drank some corona then got drunk and started eating someones toenails so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody has to evacuate the bar then the Orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldnt die and loved it so then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on youtube and the boy became famous so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk then the little boy became really rich

Me playing a game........ what did God just stop our hearts cause didn't kill everybody

This morning I was having a conversation with my ex boyfriend about reincarnation I said to him if you could come back in the next life as anything what would you come back as and he thought about it for a minute and says a tree that way everybody can look at me and admire me. Then he says the same thing to me I started thinking about it when these two sexy half naked studs walked by one was a jock the other on his bicycle I know I said I want to come back as a jockstrap or a bicycle seat but knowing my luck I'll come back as a tampon

A russian, a brit and a terrorist are in an air balloon. First the russian says "i dare to throw a stone down" So he does that but the others dont seem to be impressed so the brit says " i dare to throw a brick down " so again he does that, the russian is impressed but the terrorist laughs and says " i dare to throw a bomb down " so he does that and everybody cant believe what they have just seen so a bit further they land and a shocked and an afraid little boy comes running up to them so they ask what happened, on wich the little boy said " I farted and my school exploded".

So I'm the Cable Guy around the neighborhood and I do everybody's table so I walked into this one house and I noticed a little kid and the mom was upstairs I was asking where her mom was and she wasn't answering and it looked like something was wrong so I asked if anything was wrong she didn't answer so I kind of raise my voice at her but she still didn't answer and then I realized the hearing aid in her ear

Hitler was talking about how to fight in WW2 when someone sneezed while Hitler was giving a speech so Hitler yelled WHO SNEEZED ROW 1 DID ANYONE SNEEZE they said no and Hitler shot everybody same for row 2 & 3 but in row 4 someone nervous said me I'm sorry then Hitler said bless you

Once a bird went to search for food then suddenly he grain on a road when he saw a Bullock cart he said that's to far away then the Bullock immediately cam and the king bird came and the deceitful bird said sorry majesty I was wrong to eat this on the road and then he died and the king bird goes back and tells everybody about it