Louie being born.
Ur family reunion, a homosexual communion.
Where do you go when food dies?
A fooderal.
Why is it so hard to make a party on Earth?
Because you need to planet.
What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.
"9/11 was just a really intense game of Jenga."
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
I was going to watch the origami world championships before it folded.
But it was only on paper view.
Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?
Person 2: No.
Person 1: It was in-tents.
Stephen Hawking missed assembly this morning.
U were accidental.
9/11.
Your mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
اي تيجي اللمة بتخلص your storage
What does a man with no arms or legs do on Halloween?
Nothing.
I'm doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled.
It's called "spastics on elastics."
What ended in 1999? 1998.
Two antennas got married on a roof. The ceremony was horrible, but the reception was great!
Two artists had an art contest. It ended in a draw.
How does NASA organize a party? -- They planet.
