Even jokes
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
Your forehead is so big it can't even fit in the garage!
Your mama is so fat, she sunk Atlantis even though it's in the ocean!
My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.
Remember the big forehead kid who said, "Give me a knife, I'm going to kill myself" because of being bullied?
His head was too big to even exist, and that's why he's dead.
Teacher: Tell me a moral story.
Little Johnny: Once my grandfather was in WW2. He saw everyone praising to kill him. For example, we should sneak up and kill him. We get the helicopter above and shoot him from there. My grandfather heard this, he got his gun and shot them all.
Teacher: What is the moral even?
Little Johnny: Never plan to kill my grandfather.
Orphan jokes aren't to be made fun of.
They're just aimed at older audiences. Oh wait.
THEY AREN'T EVEN OLDER AGES.
Donald Trump didn't even finish the wall. He should have hired Mexicans to do it!
The Statue of Liberty is French; she ain't even American. Deport that bitch!
I just reached 10 million pounds in Euro Truck Simulator, but it's not even close to what Rakhmat Akilov achieved.
Your hairline is so big, not even a black hole can eat it!
If you want to SH but not in the sell farm way, come ooon.. do you even know what does that means?..
Yo mama so fat, she called Dr. Seuss and he couldn’t even rhyme back.
My grief counselor died. He was so good, I didn't even care.
Rape: The only crime where you have to tell the victim they couldn't do anything even if they could run or say something, then after, are told rapists stop them doing something about it.
What does a man with 20 children do now?
Now he eats sausages even with cellophane.
Why did the woman feel ugly?
A. Nobody would even rape her.
How do bitches talk about body positivity when they have no body to even be positive about?
Your mom is heavier than Mariah can even carry.
I wouldn't call a Suicide Help-line even if my life depended on it.