“Don’t sneeze”
Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends I would always tell them “Don’t sneeze” and when I did they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed we laughed even harder.
Also,
“It dangles and swung” Language art quizzes are the best
The wedding was so emotional, Even the cake was in tiers.
None of these are even funny. Just stupid ..
himy name is robert i have no life even my ps4 user name is gay lil_bama
Guy 1: P-gay or T-gay ?
Guy 2: P-gay sounds cooler
Guy 1: yeah me too i don't like P-ewDiePie, always love T-series
Guy 2: omg what did i just say i wasn't even knowing what were you talking about :<
Guy 1: like i do care :$
Guy 3: but i do care :<
Guy 1: fu*k you
Guy 3: do it
Guy 2: but you do care about me
Guy 3: no
Guy 2: fu*k you
Guy 3: do it
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
I'd make a joke about corn, but its to corny. Then again, i could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. my funny bone is broken, i guess it was because those jokes where to HUMERUS.
Superman was bored and wanted to go out, he called all his super friends but they were all busy. He even calls Louis but it's her time of the month. He flies to the liquor store and buy some beer and gets drunk. As has flying he sees wonder woman naked on top of the roof, he starts thinking 'I will fly down.......and have sex with her sooooo fast "BURP" that she WON'T know what happen. "HICKUP" He flies to her faster than a speed of light BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG and flies away with a smile he passes out and crashed into a wall. Wonder woman jumps up and screams 'WHAT WAS THAT........ the invisible man appears holding his butt and he gets off on wonder woman and says 'I dont know but my butt hurts real bad'.
donald trump is still the president, even after the government has been shut down.
im a teacher at a highschool but i got fired they told me i didnt do any work even though i always did a skele-ton
The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.
Bully: "I bet your dick is so small when you look down in the shower you can't even see it."
Guy: "No, I see your sister's head."
today i explain what things are fake. serial killers, clowns, billy, fairies, your life,God,Jesus,your mom, and all your crappy fan-fictions about being saved from your even crappier life.
I'm also gonna explain real stuff, youtube,your dad,scientists,teachers,God,Jesus, and Billy.
stuff on both is real and fake depending on who you are. Your life IS fake.Alot of idiots will read this.
whats the grossest thing ever? A bag of dead babies whats even more gross? The bottom one is still wriggling
When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker’s circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to yet another rubber-chicken dinner, Einstein mentioned to his driver (a man who somewhat resembled Einstein in looks & manner) that he was tired of speechmaking.
“I have an idea, boss,” his driver said. “I’ve heard you give this speech so many times. I’ll bet I could give it for you.” Einstein laughed loudly and said, “Why not? Let’s do it!”
When they arrived at the dinner, Einstein donned the driver's cap and jacket and sat in the back of the room. The driver gave a beautiful rendition of Einstein’s speech and even answered a few questions expertly.
Then a supremely pompous professor asked an extremely esoteric question about anti-matter formation, digressing here and there to let everyone in the audience know that he was nobody’s fool. Without missing a beat, the driver fixed the professor with a steely stare and said, “Sir, the answer to that question is so simple that I will let my driver, who is sitting in the back, answer it for me.”
yo mamma so ugly that even god said be gone DEMON!
What happens when you bring a paedophile to a babies birthday party. You will have even more birthday parties to go to.
I should be ashamed of myself for making all these jokes at the expense of the disabled! after all, they can't even stand up for themselves
Famous last words:
"Don't worry man, it's not even loaded."
why is the penis so light?
Because even thots can lift them
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
