Even jokes
After my wife died, I couldn't even look at another woman for 10 years.
But now that I'm out of jail, I can honestly say it was worth it!
Your hairline's so far back even Rosa Parks refused to sit there.
Why can't Hitler join track?
Because he can't even finish a race.
So I meet with a therapist on a weekly basis. We talk about my depression and how it's been getting worse. Recently, I've been advised about my condition, and how I've been discussing with her about being suicidal. She's been very helpful throughout it. I was even told I can pay in advance from now on, so I don't have to worry about it later.
Your hairline goes so far back even Dora the Explorer couldn’t find it.
Your mamma's so ugly, even the toaster wouldn't get in the bathtub with her.
Bully: "I bet your dick is so small when you look down in the shower you can't even see it."
Guy: "No, I see your sister's head."
Two boys were arguing in class one day when the teacher walked into the classroom.
The teacher asked them, "Why are you arguing?"
One of the boys replied, "We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."
"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher. "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."
The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
I am still trying to figure out why paying the COVID doctors a compliment is so offensive. They even kicked me out, and all I said was to stay positive...
Even Steph Curry can't hit threes from behind your hairline.
It’s sad because with all these mean jokes Stephen hawkings can’t even Stand up for himself
To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.
Everything is so racist these days, you can't even say "black paint" anymore. You now have to say "Tyrone can you please paint that wall?"
How do bitches talk about body positivity when they have no body to even be positive about?
The suicide hotline didn't even give me advice on how to kill myself. Not helpful at all.
My grief counselor died today. He did such a great job. I don't even care.
Me having a good day. Going on a walk on a peaceful day.
My depression: hey, what's up!
Me: go away.
My depression: well how rude.
Me: 🙄.
My depression: remember that one time......
Me: no, don't even.
My depression: that we.....
Me: nope.
My depression: *says really fast*: said that one stupid joke that wasn't funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilled water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like you do every single night.
Me: 😳😶😟.
My depression: 😉 don't worry I'll always be here for you.
How do you make 7 an even number? Take the "s" out!
I SH so much, even when I die and become a ghost, you can see red stripes floating around the room.
I should be ashamed of myself for making all these jokes at the expense of the disabled! After all, they can't even stand up for themselves.